Doubts even here

I feel so tortured. Between last night and this morning I washed the black dye out of my hair. My mother suggested that I wait a bit before putting in the red. I think she really just wanted to see me look like a little girl again. I felt so depressed I went along with it. I even put the pink Hello Kitty or whatever it was sweatshirt on my grandmother sent me for Christmas. My mother got a few photographs in and then I went out for coffee. I saw people I knew at the Second Cup so I decided that since I was so abject anyway, I'd just go to Tim Horton's. Nobody noticed me, which was good. Then Duncan came in and found me. We talked about yesterday (he went with me to Mount Pleasant and helped with my cousin Enid's project, and then we met up with her weird record collecting boyfriend) and then he said he'd walk me home since he was really good at going through people's backyards. It was really nice of him. We got to my backyard and he hugged me goodbye. I hadn't noticed that Charles Wallace was out there, too. Unfortunately Charles Wallace noticed us. He went up to Duncan and said, "Are you going to sleep with my sister?" Duncan stuttered a bit and then ran, then I ran after Charles Wallace. My mother stopped me before I could do much damage, and reminded me that I had to do the red.
The red doesn't actually look that bad. Charles Wallace said I looked sort of like Agent Scully, if she were taller and geekier. My mother sighed: I used to watch The X-Files with her when I was little, and once I said I wanted to be a pathologist. My mother thought that meant I wanted to be a doctor, and she was disappointed when I decided to be an English major.